Reck Club finds that they don't actually need 60 people to do their job
A secret internal investigation carried out by a Reck Club committee (the committee was comprised of members from Reck Club's 14 other completely unnecessary committees) produced a stunning report that Crouton reporters found completely by accident during one of their weekly team bonding dumpster dives. The report's conclusions state that the work of taking care of the Reck, putting together a book on traditions that all freshmen lose within two hours of their first day on campus, and getting the student population excited about the Taxslayer Bowl could actually be done by four people, rather than the 60 members that the club currently has.
Though Reck Club senior leadership refused to speak with us, Reck Club member Garrett Brady, a 3rd year business major, chose to share his thoughts on the report with us. Speaking in front of Bobby Dodd Stadium still wearing his Reck Club polo even though he wasn't technically doing anything for the club that day, Brady commented, "Yeah, I mean, I guess I always knew deep down that we didn't need an army to maintain the Reck. Like seriously, two people drive it, two people fix it, and everyone else just stands around on the field clapping at the beginning of the game."
Brady took on a more contemplative tone as he continued, "If 90% of us don't to anything, what are we? Are we just some random group that wears matching polos and khakis and shows up to football games?" This comment seemed to agitate the 3rd year as he nervously toyed with his lanyard and shuffled his Sperrys. "Yeah..." he went on to say, "I think we might be a frat. Oh crap, we're totally just a frat. Without a house. Crap."
At this point in the interview the conversation got suuuuuper awkward so we just left him to contemplate his new status as a member of the saddest fraternity on campus. The Crouton has yet to receive a response from Reck Club's official spokesperson.
Disclaimer: This article is a work of satire. None of the events described below occurred in real life. None of the opinions expressed reflect those of Georgia Tech. There is no malice meant in the writing of this article and it's sole purpose is comedic effect.
-
BREAKING: Donald and Melania officially introduce the first dog of the #Trump White House https://t.co/LTQ0WKPYXZ
-
BREAKING: Elizabeth Warren takes DNA Test to Prove She is Not Hillary Clinton https://t.co/Bp6rv5ac9E
-
BREAKING: Geoff Collins to coach the Yellow Geojackets in 2019 #GeorgiaTechFootball https://t.co/YWH4bXX8Fg