International Plan requirements updated, Spring Break in Cancun officially counts

Source: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8f/A_beach_party.jpg

Source: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8f/A_beach_party.jpg

The Office of International Education announced early on Thursday that the week you spend in Cancun buttchugging Miller Lites and getting skin cancer because “real bros don’t burn” officially counts towards the 26-weeks required to graduate with the International Plan Certificate that indicates international proficiency. Said Director of International Education Shelby Brown, “We discussed it as a committee and came to the realization that spending a week on a beach chugging Coronas and yelling what you remember about the menu at Tech Taco at the locals to prove that you speak Spanish is an immersive experience that should count towards an official institute certificate in international proficiency. The ability to get away with committing a minor felony in another country by yelling ‘I’m American, bitches’ and running away is a life skill that comes in handy for most American international businessmen.”

New initiatives have sprung up around campus to take advantage of this incredible opportunity. Dawson Adams Guswiler, president of the SAE fraternity on campus, said, “We’re taking advantage of this opportunity to earn a collective international plan certificate for the house. If we send 26 brothers down to Mexico for spring break for a week, the house earns the certificate without any of us having to spend too much time with Mexicans.” Several sororities are said to be considering similar programs that will allow them to earn the certificate “while getting their tan on and dancing up on Spanish guys.”

The Office of International Education is also said to be discussing a similar exemption for that week you spent in Guatemala forcing little brown kids to play soccer with you so you can have a facebook profile picture with the caption “#Blessed to be helping kids like Juanito here [his name is Pedro] by building him a school [it collapsed within a week because you don’t know how to build shit]”.

Disclaimer: This article is a work of satire. None of the events described below occurred in real life. None of the opinions expressed reflect those of Georgia Tech. 

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