"He swiped me into the dining hall": 10 tips for dating in college
Make use of Piazza: You may have noticed a trend in PDA (Piazza Displays of Affection) – that’s because it really works! If you’re afraid to reach out to that cute guy or gal in your class, don’t be afraid to utilize Piazza and its anonymous post capabilities to make moves on said person by posting vague and slightly creepy comments to really grab their attention.
Give little gifts: This is the perfect time to put all of that cool swag you’ve collected in your time at college to good use: Chick-fil-a coupons, any free t shirt you’ve gotten from SAA or IsraelFest, used textbooks, even your old FASET name tag (be sure to scratch out yours and put the name of you S/O), can turn into fun and romantic gifts that are sure to charm that someone special in your life.
Make use of public spaces: If you’re looking for a place to get cozy but your roommate just won’t give you the space you need, be sure to find public places that will do the job. A really great place for this is the CULC bean bag room – nothing says romance like an unemployed bachelor's sad excuse for furniture!
Dining Dollars: At this time in the semester, Dining Dollars are a hot commodity; that makes the person who has them even hotter. Use those dining dollars to treat your boo to anything they want in the Student Center Food Court, and you are sure to get a rave response. Freshman Tessa Pickles says about this particular move, “You can’t buy my love, but you sure can get close with Dining Dollars.”
3D Printing: No one can resist jewelry!! Print the model of your choice and then simply attach to a piece of string or utilize another one of those free lanyards you’ve picked up this year, and BOOM! Your S/O will have a beautiful piece of jewelry that will leave their mothers saying “Well…uh…it’s the thought that counts.”
Pull out classic moves: Remember in middle school when you would take the hat off of your own head and put it on your S/O? This move is still just as romantic and effective in the realm of college life. Think of it as your one stop route to both head lice and someone’s heart with the slight implication of marking your territory like an animal! Chivalry is not dead! (This move is most effective if done with some sort of flat billed headwear or Pokémon trainer hat; additionally, the hat can be substituted for your high school letter jacket which is still totally cool)
Shack Shirts: If your "special friend" happens to take up residence with you in your luxurious dorm for the night, be sure to give them a shirt (make sure it’s the worst shirt in your closet) to wear home! No one wants to go home in the cat outfit that they somehow worked into that “Throwback Thursday” mixer they went to last night. Not only will this save a trip to Goodwill by getting rid of your unwanted shirts, but it also validates the fact that Becky can only talk about your sleepover for the next week!
Meeting the RA/PL: This is really for when you’re ready to take the next step together. When you feel the time is right, bring your S/O back to the dorm and introduce them to your away-from-home parent, the person in your life who cares about your love life on about the same level as he cares about spelling your name right on your door decoration. If said PL/RA doesn’t approve of the person you have brought home, it is best to tell the S/O that you don’t feel good and should probably get some sleep. After the S/O has left, delete all contact information, and go out with your friends so you can awkwardly run into them later in the night.
If you’re looking to splurge and impress your S/O with a day of luxury, two words: Segway Tours. This is the perfect opportunity to show your other half a good time and you're sure to ride your way right into her heart by getting tickets to this tour of an area she already knows. BONUS – this will really give your S/O a great look into what your trip to the Bahamas will look like in 30 years if you two end up getting married and starting a mundane life with your two shitty kids in the suburbs!
Talk about test scores: There is nothing people love more than to be reminded of their test scores. What do you have in your arsenal? SAT scores? That CS test you both took? Use them! If they scored lower than you, which if you are talking openly about your test scores, they probably did, be sure to tell them “Aw you’ll get it next time!” This reassurance will show your sensitive side and ensure your love interest that they are well supported.
Enjoy the small victories. Like when your $12 bottle of Malbec actually tastes like a $13 bottle of Malbec.
Millennial Wedding Toasts: "And that's when I knew...I'd right swiped my future wife."