Candidate Profile: Lizzie and Connor

Lizzie and Connor are technically undefeated in SGA presidential elections in the same way that Georgia Tech's ferret racing team is undefeated in Division 1 play. But what do the voters need to know about these candidates?

Lizzie Lisenby

Pros

  • Technically listed as the 5th string kicker on the Georgia Tech football team's depth chart
  • Complete a tour of campus doing the backwards tour guide walk the entire time
  • Successfully disguised herself as All-American Offensive Lineman Shaq Mason for two quarters of a game against Clemson before Shaq broke out of the supply closet she left him in and made his way to the field
  • Was awarded “Most Improved Extra” during the filming of the movie The Intern

Cons

  • Never owned a pair of Heelys in middle school
  • Has had to repeatedly deny accusations that she uses a private gmail account instead of her official gatech account
  • Doesn’t actually know all the words to “Up with the White and Gold”
  • Favors Chipotle over Moes

Connor Brogan

Pros

  • Is planning to build two new Blue Donkey locations in his dimples
  • Has never made a really obvious joke about the Love Manufacturing Building
  • Can flip his hair a full 195 degrees without suffering a serious neck injury (J-Biebs can only flip his 180 degrees)
  • Certified to teach people to dougie

Cons

  • Has 20/20 vision but can’t see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch
  • Has thus far been non-committal about initiatives to bring hoverboards back to campus
  • Prefers Cool Ranch over Nacho Cheese Doritos
  • Once wore pink on Friday instead of Wednesday
The Crouton